Knowing God

Hello Sister,  

My family and I moved to Washington at the end of May.  My husband is a physician in training in pediatrics at JBLM.  There were a few weeks that we were getting out of boxes and I just was in that transition of missing the old, getting settled into the new, wanting normalcy; yet, all the while, feeling unsettled. I was driving home from the gym one day and my son had fallen asleep in the car.  I had a minute when things were quiet. I remember asking God questions, “Who am I right now?” “What do you have for me here in this new place?” Have you ever been there, too? So I asked, and then I was quiet (which is something that I should be more often after I ask God a question).  And God said quietly, “I want you to know me.” This was the first layer of his answer.

 During Pastor Phillip’s sermon series in John, Pastor Phillip suggested reading through the whole book of John and said we’d be blessed. Well, God gave me the next layer to his answer. He gave me John 17:3-4 Jesus himself said, “Now this is eternal life: that they know you, the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom you have sent. ” So now, the answer to my question was getting to be even less about me.  A beautiful layer was added, “I want you to know me and my son, Jesus Christ. And because of the love we have for you, you can know us.” He also packaged it, “This is not only your answer for right now, this is your answer forever. For eternity, I want you to keep knowing me.” I was getting the depth of this lesson that he was teaching me. This is the gospel! This is the most familiar thing to me; but I was seeing it with new eyes.

Shortly after this, the sign-ups for Women’s Tuesday Life Groups was released, and I read through the list. The Lord led me to sign up for Knowing God by Name. He answered my question with an opportunity that had the very words he’d spoken to me a couple of months before and now, it was even more personal. Know me intimately, know me by name! So, that’s layer three if you’re still counting.  

I’m also participating in BSF (Bible Study Fellowship) this year. The study is looking at the life of Moses and God gave me another layer through His Word. God has just told Moses that He was sending him to be the deliverer of His people that were enslaved in Egypt. Moses says in Exodus 3:11 “Who am I that I should go to Pharaoh to bring my people the Israelites out of Egypt?” In the following verses he gives several excuses to the Lord as to why he doesn’t think he can do the task he was given. In giving these excuses to the Lord we see that he is wrestling with his identity and the purpose God has for him. He’s pleads with the LORD, “I might not be who you think I am. Even if I did go, who would I say sent me? And what am I supposed to say?” His unsettledness and excuses are similar to my question to God, “Who am I, Lord?” How does the Lord answer him? He answered in the same way he did with me. He didn’t answer in terms that defined Moses. He answered in terms that defined Himself. He says “I will be with you.” And with grace he turns the words in Moses’ question (“Who am I?”), and says “I Am Who I Am.”  

He has faithfully answered my question. And, this is where the rubber meets the road.  To know Him I have to spend TIME with Him and He’s teaching me it has to be on a daily basis. God has been so faithful as I’ve asked for help with consistency.  

First of all, He’s shown me that time with Him is always time well spent. A (nearly) daily quiet time with Him puts me in an upward spiral! I put a little time in, He teaches me big things, and I want to spend even more time with Him. Secondly, He’s provided a specific strategy to help me. My challenge is getting started; so I’ve been laying my Bible and studies out on the kitchen table at night so that they are open and ready the next morning. It also gives me a peek at what he is going to teach me the next day. This preview gives me the energy to start! Lastly, He’s shown me his grace. As his child he has shown me that even if I miss a day of listening to Him (reading his word and spending time in prayer) there is no punishment. He’s shown me that the shame I feel is not from Him. Though there is no shame, I will miss the blessing of knowing Him more.  He is always faithful in teaching and changing me! 

Ponder His goodness, bless the Lord for His answers, and thank Him for offering Himself and His grace when we didn’t know that’s what we needed.

In Him,

Grace Strube